Noelle's Birthday

Time to Clean the House

Douglas arrived Saturday morning, and complained that the house was not clean. I agreed, and showed him the beat up broom that belongs to Maria that I have to work with. My mop went out last week just before I was having the Obama people over, and it broke apart in my hand as I tried to clean the floor on my hands and knees.

So we went down to the local dollar store and found all the stuff I needed for under $20.00 - a nice new broom, a nice metal standing dust pan, a "Sham Wow" type cloth mop (great!), and best of all, a nice bucket specifically made for cloth mops.

I was so thrilled with my new cleaning supplies that when we got back, I immediately put on Mozart's Requiem and started cleaning. I mean I really scrubbed, bleached all the base boards, bleached all the surfaces, swept and washed all the floors.

While I was doing the kitchen and bathroom, Douglas had Spane get all the stuff that was on the living room floor up - mostly toys and pieces of paper that had gotten under things. There was only one large bag of trash, I was surprised. Half way through this, Noelle, the birthday girl, came over and helped Spane.

Time to Go to the Party

We all went over to the party across the street. Stevie was barbecuing, and Amber had great fun games for the kids.

Amber and I went back and got the star of the show, the cake. It really looked amazing as Amber had put gel on the waterfall part. I'll have pictures soon, I promise. Everyone had cake and really enjoyed it.

When everyone had eaten cake, presents were opened. Noelle was really excited that she got a Pillow Pet, and she liked the presents we made for her.

Back to Amber's

So, everyone went back to Amber's house after the party. Spane played with the other kids, and Douglas and I went and talked with the adults. We had a nice time, and then he left to go home.

Spane and I stayed a while longer, then Amber drove us home.

Remembering Ollie Hammond's

Back in the day, my friends and I used to go to Ollie Hammond's after the clubs and get breakfast. I remember Ollie Hammond's had these wonderful home fried made with red potatoes. When Spane and I got home from Amber's I asked him if he was hungry and he said he was ravenous. So, I whipped up some scrambled eggs with leeks and white cheddar, bacon and red potato home fries. We ate everything with gusto, and I gave Spane his Seroquel and pain medication.

Spane Had a Big Day

Spane had a big day, and he fell asleep on the couch. I woke him up, and we went to sleep together.

It was a nice day!

Shoes For School

Spane Gets Shoes

When John brought Spane home, we had an impromptu fashion show as Spane tried on the shoes that John had gotten for him. John got him a pair of sandals that he can wear for the rest of summer, black deck shoes with gray stars, and light brown lace up canvas shoes. All these shoes are wonderful because they will let Spane's feet breath - he has bad food odor. Pictures of the shoes are below.

Mom Ate Something Bad

While I was sitting here at the computer waiting for Spane to get home, I got hungry, and since it was Friday, and therefore no meat, I looked in the refrigerator, and there was a krab salad sandwich that Spane had not eaten on Monday. It tasted a little off, so I didn't eat all of it.

Mushrooms for Dinner

I had made stuffed mushrooms in the afternoon. The recipe is available for Stuffed Mushrooms in Wine Sauce is available at The Good Plate, and I served them with baked potatoes with all the fixin's, except bacon. We had a nice dinner.

Spane and I watched TV together, and I gave him his pain and "voices" medication. He said it wasn't working, and I'm sure he meant that the voices medicine, Seroquel, does not work for headache pain.

He did not want to go to sleep, but I told him he had to if he wanted to go to Noelle's party the next day, so he reluctantly toddled off to bed.

Two A Day - Count Down to Saturday

One for the Money...

So, today was the first day of one Seroquel in the morning, and one at night. I was surprised the Spane did not get tired in the morning.

We live near the Maple Park Community Center, and Spane wanted to go with the kids next door, but he needed permission from me. Amber came by to get some oil she needed to make the cake, and I was in the middle of making the marzipan figurines.

John Comes By

John came over this afternoon to pick up Spane because I have something to do with Josef Rotter tomorrow, Friday. Spane is going to spend the night at John's and come back tomorrow. Because I did some computer work for John, he is going to take Spane to a show place near him and get Spane shoes for school and the rest of the summer. Spane's sandals that we bought a little over a month ago are trashed!

Here Comes Daddy!

So, while I am talking with John, the phone rings and it is Douglas, and he wants to know if it's okay if he comes over, and I say yes. Spane is really happy about this because he had not seen his father for a few months. John is a little worried because he is going to be taking Spane away, and fears how Douglas will react.

Douglas reacted just fine. He came with Pauly, and Pauly sat on the couch and petted Rolo. Douglas and Spane went outside and played for a while, then it was time for Douglas to go, maybe an hour.

Douglas promised he could come by on Saturday for Noelle's birthday party, and he and Pauly left.

Spane Goes

I gave John Spane's medication and told him that Spane needed to have one Seroquel that night, and one in the morning. I also gave him a 300mg Ibuprofen for pain. Spane had his back pack packed up with jeans and a pajama bottom.

Spane and John left in time to get the next bus, and I went over to Amber's house to give her the marzipan ladies, and got a lesson in fondant. Her kids were over at another friends' house as well, so we had a very nice time.

Wow! A Math Genius!

Dad Confirms

Douglas called me at 6:58 this morning. He called to tell me he had realized that he has been having headaches all his life, and that he just got used to them. He also said he doesn't think he is schizophrenic, and I agree. I lived with a schizophrenic to two years, Nana Marissa, and Douglas isn't anything like that. He's like Spane.

So, Douglas is coming over today. That should be interesting. Maria doesn't like him, and at one point had threatened to call the police on him for elder abuse. I never got why she thought he was abusing her - he didn't yell at her, hit her, insult her - all he was was kind and respectful. I think something is wrong with Maria - that she may be ill, but that's a whole other story.

Our Son is a Math Wiz

In the mail this morning was Spane's STAR Student Report. This is the California Standardized Testing and Reporting program that measures a child's progress in meeting the state's academic content standards, which describes what all students should know and be able to do at each grade level.

Spane got a 453 in Mathematics, and placed in the Advanced level. The highest possible score is 600. This is how he scored:

Mathematics

Content	Spane	Other Kids
Place Value, Addition and Subtraction	93%	75% - 90%
Multiplication, Division, and Fractions	91%	75% - 90%
Algebra and Functions	100%	70% - 85%
Measurement and Geometry	93%	80% - 90%
Statistics, Data Analysis, and Probability	86%	75% - 85%

Not So Good in Reading

I wonder if reading takes more concentration than math. I imagine it must, because Spane did not do so well on English Language Arts. He still tested as Proficient, so I am happy about that.

English Language Arts

Content Area	Spane	Other Kids
Word Analysis and Vocabulary Development	73%	75% - 85%
Reading Comprehension	67%	70% - 80%
Literary Response and Analysis	83%	80% - 85%
Writting Conventions	79%	75% - 85%
Writing Strategies	63%	70% - 80%

See the questions Spane had to answer.

Daddy's Home

Douglas is Out

Douglas, Spane's biological father, has been in and out of jail as long as I have known him. He's not a violent criminal, he's an alcoholic, drug abuser, who gets manic at dusk, and can then get violent. This time, he got 3 months for something really stupid - and it seems that he had the bad luck of being stopped by an officer who was training a recruit, and it had to look really good.

I had asked his friend, Pauly, not to say anything to him about Spane's condition until I talked to him. Apparently, he did not as Douglas at first said that I was making a big deal out of nothing. Then I started telling him what was really going on, he listened, and was then amazed.

I told Douglas about the headaches, the hearing of voices, seeing 42 people with Bully written on them, nightmares, stomach pains, the manic at night. I told him it was a very serious matter, and that Spane was taking Seroquel prescribed by his new psychiatrist.

I reminded Douglas that when I had first met him he had had really bad headaches, that started right around sunset, and that was also around the time when he would get manic. When he was actually in a prison he was diagnosed as schizophrenic, and given medication to help it. He told me he had been changed to several medications, but none of them seem to be working right.

Is Dad Like This, Too?

The symptoms that Douglas has just seem so similar to Spane's, and when Douglas called me later, just at sunset to tell me he had a huge headache, I was not surprised. I am quite sure that if Douglas were to get tested for Dandy Walker, he would pass with flying colors. I'm glad that Spane was diagnosed when he was - maybe there is hope for both of them.

So What Have I Learned Today?

My theory about Spane getting nasty with me because he was suffering from a headache had turned out to be true. Shortly after talking to Douglas, I asked Spane if he would like a pain medication, and sheepishly said yes. That was about 6:30 p.m, and I gave him his voices medicine , Seroquel, at about 8 p.m.

Spane wanted to play Monopoly, so I asked him to clean up the toys in the living room, and clean off the dining room table while I washed the dishes. He was very accommodating, and in fact took extra care to actually wash the table.

Spane likes to be the banker, and he likes everything in its place. He's a good little banker, even when the Seroquel is making him a little sleepy. I told him we would play until 10:00 p.m., and then I wanted him to take a bath and go to bed. He said that was fine, as long as we could keep the game on the table and start off the next day.

Well, that was going along just fine until Rolo came back from her nightly constitutional, and jumped on the table so we couldn't play our game. The picture at left was taken in 2010 on another day when Rolo didn't want us to play.

Spane took his shower, and when he came out, he didn't seem to be too sleepy, so I told him he could watch TV for fifteen minutes, but he had to pick up whatever toys he had on the floor. He didn't want to do that. He brought me a little piece of paper at 11:00 p.m. that had the word pain on it. I gave him a pain pill, and told him he needed to lay down and get some sleep. This was starting to get into an argument, and I reminded him that he could lose going to Noelle's party on Saturday if he did not comply. Then I said he could take a book or watch a tape to help go to sleep.

Finally, he was asleep at 1:00. I went to bed at 1:30 and fell right to sleep.

So, the moral of the story is for me - check for a headache first, then give medication, and wait until the pain subsides before allowing my child to push any of my buttons.

Headaches R Us

Mommy is Smart

So, last night before I went to bed, I remembered to take an aspirin. I knew if I didn't I would have a hang over, and I hadn't even finished the presentation I did to show how to use Social Marketing for market eCostway's wonderful products. When I got up, I had a wee left over, but not enough that I could not finish my presentation.

At the eCosway Store

I really enjoy shopping at the eCosway store in Encino. There are lots pf products I am looking forward to trying, since I have seen and heard a lot of positive words from real product users. Spane was great, since he had to go with us. He listened to my presentation, and to the presentation about the magical water, and the pendant. I'll be posting more about that over at the new blog Peaceful For Life, so please be sure and bookmark that, too.

It was a long day, and I offered to make lunch at my house, and stopped at the store to get some crab salad and croissants. I already had lettuce, candied pecans, grapefruit and raspberry dressing to make salad like I did for the Organizing for America lunch on Sunday.

Spane Does Not Eat

I had told Spane that since he was such a good boy all that time at eCosway, that he could have just that afternoon bike off from being grounded. He did not want to eat, and continued riding after everyone left. He still wasn't hungry, but when he came in a 6:30, with the sun still way up, he said that his poor stomach hurt so much he could not ride anymore. I felt awful, since he had not even eaten.

I knew that it was going to be time for me to give him the Seroquel, and I was really hesitating since he had not eaten. Finally, at 8:00 he said that he had eaten something, so I gave him the pill.

Things Get Weird

Usually, before this, the Seroquel would make Spane sleepy and he would fall asleep about a half an hour after giving it to him. Tonight that did not happen, and he sat and watched TV.

I asked Spane to please put the toys away that were on the bed. I asked him three time over a half an hour period, and finally, I got tired of waiting, and I took those toys, put them in bag and put them in the trash. Spane knows this about me, that I will eventually lose it and throw things away that are not put away. If he doesn't care enough to take care of his toys, then there's sense in keeping them. Mind you, the entire time I am doing this, I keep telling him all he had to do is put the toys away, but he just keeps protesting.

Well, Spane freaked out and went in that bathroom and started slamming the door. By this time, it was 10:30 at night, and I was worried about him waking up the neighbors.

I walked into the bathroom, and I threw a glass of water in his face. When he was little, that was something that could bring him out of a tantrum, I figured why not? Well, he started hitting me instead, hard. I told him I was done and that I was going to call someone. He ran past me, and grabbed the phone. The next thing I knew, he had taken the phone and thrown it into the outside trash bin. That's when I told him that he could not go to Noelle's birthday party on Saturday. Then he really got upset because he realized he had thrown the phone into the bottom of the dumpster, and he was too short to reach in and get it.

You probably think I am a horrible mother. I did not offer to get the phone back out of the trash. I told him that he was the one who put it there, so he was responsible for getting it out. I also told him that getting the phone out did not necessarily mean that he could still go to Noelle's birthday. Well, he finally put the can on its side, climbed in and retrieved the phone. He gave it to me, and I cleaned it up with some Windex. I told him that he could go to Noelle's birthday if he did everything I said up until that point.

We were sitting in the kitchen, and I mentioned his head. He immediately told me that his head was hurting so much he could not believe it. I asked him why he had not said anything earlier, and he said that just talking about it made it worse. I kept telling him that it was worth it to tell me for five seconds, and get medication, than to wait and wait and suffer. He kept on holding his head and wailing, and finally, I was able to get him to take some pain medication.

I put him on the couch, a while later he said that the medication was helping, and he was really happey. He watched some television until he fell asleep.

What Have I Learned?

I must be thick as a brick. It has not occurred to me until now that Spane is having a headache when he's not paying attention, or not doing what I ask. Those escalate into fights, and I hate that. I still don't know if he's going to tell me if he has a headache, but at least now I can ask him, gently, secretly so that it won't get as Spane says "worser".

Sometimes We Don't Want to Deal

Go to Mass

Sunday morning, I got up and had some coffee. The phone rang and it was Spane's Catechism teacher on the phone. I had asked her if we could meet so I could give her some forms that SSI wanted from Spane's teachers. She asked me if we could meet before the 11:00am Mass, and I said that would be fine.

Help the President

I had just hung up the phone with Spane's teacher when the phone rang again, and it was one of the ladies we had met when we went to the Organizing America two Sundays ago. She was calling to remind me that we had a meeting that day, and also to say that no place had been set, and would I be willing to host it? I said, of course I would.

In the Court Yard

I don't know how we managed to do it, but we got to the court yard only 5 minutes late. Spane's teacher was there, as well as some of the other teachers. We sat down, and I gave Spane's teacher the paperwork for her to fill out and mail back.

Then we went into Mass and heard the readings, including the one and only time that Jesus was not very nice, Matthew 15:21-28. The homily following that Gospel really brought some things home - how sometimes we have to deal with people and things we don't want to.

At that time, Jesus withdrew to the region of Tyre and Sidon.
And behold, a Canaanite woman of that district came and called out,
"Have pity on me, Lord, Son of David!
My daughter is tormented by a demon."
But Jesus did not say a word in answer to her.
Jesus' disciples came and asked him,
"Send her away, for she keeps calling out after us."
He said in reply,
"I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel."
But the woman came and did Jesus homage, saying, "Lord, help me."
He said in reply,
"It is not right to take the food of the children
and throw it to the dogs."
She said, "Please, Lord, for even the dogs eat the scraps
that fall from the table of their masters."
Then Jesus said to her in reply,
"O woman, great is your faith!
Let it be done for you as you wish."
And the woman's daughter was healed from that hour.

After Mass, we went to the neighborhood Armenian stores to get a few things for the gathering. I wanted to make finger sandwiches, salad, crudités, and iced tea.

The house still looked nice after Thursday when Spane cleaned up, so while I made the food, Spane straightened up. He did a great job.

Organizing for American

We had a good meeting, talking about what we can do in our community to organize voters to win the election for the President. Spane played outside with his chalk while we had our meeting.

Mom Gets Drunk

Amber called me and asked if I would help her with some stuff, and I agreed, telling her that I had a whole bunch of food. She said she would bring wine.

The problem with wine in a box is that I cannot tell how much wine I have had. Usually, if I get a bottle of wine, I have about two thirds of the bottle, and save the rest for the next day. With the box, I just kept on pouring! Next thing I knew, I was pretty drunk. Spane went next door to watch The Incredibles and when he came home, I was asleep on the couch.

He went in his room and watched his videos. Finally, I woke up at 1:30 because he had them on so loud. Poor Maria! I also gave him his pill, and laid down again. When I was sure he was asleep, I got up, took and aspirin and went to bed.