Friday, February 3, 2012

Afraid to Go to Bed

Spane told me last night that he was afraid to go to bed.   That's why we had such a bad time yesterday.

We had a good discussion this morning of how the voices work.  It's been a while since they've been around - they were suppressed by the Seroquel.   I thought I should ask him in the morning before the "beaties" come out.

Spane said that the voices are very loud, and often scream at him.  He said that the ONLY time they come is when he has a headache, which usually starts around dusk.

That means to me, if we can keep the headaches away, we can keep the voices away.  So, I told Spane to let me know if there is even a HINT of a headache coming, I'll give him some pain medication, and hopefully the beasties won't even get a chance to come!

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Back to Days of Atonement

Well, my idea that Spane would be okay without the Benedril was really, really wrong.  What happened last night brought me right back to where we were in September of 2010 [read document]

Spane didn't feel good, probably because he's gotten the same cold that's been going around our group of friends.  I thought he would probably go to bed early because of it.

At 8:30 pm Wednesday night, I asked Spane if he would like to play Mille Borne with me, and he said yes.  I figured a short game, and then he would go to bed.  We played, he lost.

There was a really good show on Nova, and Spane asked if he could stay up and watch it.  I said if he was quiet, and sat on the sofa with me, and promised to go to bed at 10:00 pm, he could.

Of course, at 10:00 pm, he wanted to stay up more.  He came up with every excuse in the book, he wasn't tired, he was hungry, and I just kept telling him to go to bed.  Finally, I tried to give him some pain reliever thinking he had a headache.

He was resistant, so in trying to hold his mouth open, I mistakenly pulled his hair.  He opened his mouth, I put the aspirin in, he spit it out and ran off to the kitchen.

I apologized, offered him more medicine, and then put a bag of frozen vegetables on his head.  He wanted to lay on the sofa.  I wanted him to go to bed.  Finally, I relented and let him lay on the sofa with the bag on his head.  I got him to take the aspirin. When he felt better, I told him to go to bed.  He refused.  He said it wasn't fair that he had to go to bed when I got to stay up as long as I wanted to.

I tried to explain to him that everyone needs a little wind down time before they go to bed, and that was what I wanted to do, and would join him soon.  He wanted to sleep in the living room, I didn't want him to because I needed my wind down time, and I can't do that with him talking to me.

To appease him, I said I would go to bed with him right then, and I put on my pajamas and got a book to read.  Of course, that was also a battle because he complained about the light.  By this time, I was getting a little tired myself, so I got up and turned off the light.

Shades of last summer!  Spane insisted on covering me with pillows and stuffed animals, laughing all the time.  It was maniacal laugher.  It was scaring me, and I felt powerless.  He wasn't even getting any less hyper, in fact, it was increasing.  Finally, I turned over and started tickling him.  Then, when he couldn't take it anymore, he jumped up and went into the bathroom.

I got up, fixed the blankets, and laid down again. Spane came in, grabbed all the blankets and went back into the bathroom, saying he was going to sleep in there.  I said fine, and shut my eyes.

A few minutes later, he came back with a blanket and covered me.  He was crying.  He was saying that he was a really bad child, and that he didn't deserve to have a blanket.  I tried to comfort him, but he would not take a blanket, even though he said he was freezing.  Then he said he didn't even deserve a bed, and left saying he was going to sleep on the floor in the living room.

That scared me to no end.  He sounded so despondent I was afraid he might try to hurt himself.

I got up and followed him, reached down to him on the floor, and told him the everyone has bad days, and he just had a bad day.  I told him he was a great kid, that I loved him very much.  He still insisted that he was bad.  I asked him to sit with me on the sofa, and when he did, I hugged him and kissed him, and tried to bring his spirits back.

By this time, it was 12:30 in the morning.  He wasn't sleepy at all, and I was out of ideas.  Then I asked him if he wanted to watch a movie, so we got Kung Fu Panda 2 on demand and watched that.  We split a baloney sandwich, too.

I thought that he would fall asleep watching the movie, but it was me who found myself nodding towards the end.  When it was over, I said I was going to bed.  He didn't seem to be in any danger, so I thought it was okay to do that.

He got in bed with me, and hugged me, still not wanting a blanket.  Then he told me that he didn't have any friends.  He just sounded so sad.  Finally, about 3:30 am, I heard him snoring.

He's home today because he really didn't feel good this morning at 8:30 when I tried to wake him up.  He got up at 11:00 this morning, and looked sick.  He's watching TV.

I'm going to the pharmacy and getting him some Benedril.

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Two for One

We went to see Dr. Red today and Clara together so we could go over a treatment plan for Spane.  Dr. Red again emphasized that Seroquel was not a good choice, and gave me a prescription for Benedril instead.

I thought we already had some in the medicine cabinet, so I didn't fill the prescription.  Spane went to bed around 11pm, which wasn't so bad.   I don't think it's going to be that bad.

I hate the idea of having Spane on Benedril again, like he was before he was diagnosed with Dandy Walker.  I'm going to see just how bad it gets and decide from there.  So far, so good.

Monday, January 30, 2012

Following the Schedule

That computer is WONDERFUL.  I told Spane that I had put a timer on the computer so it would shut off at 9 pm, and he was fine with it.  When the computer shut itself off, he got up, kissed me, and went to bed!

Sunday, January 29, 2012

A Three Hour Tour...

Yesterday, Spane and I took the train to Santa Clarita to help Theresa install her printer to her new computer, and install some virus software.  It should have taken about three hours, maximum.

When we got there, I asked Theresa if she had heard anything from Douglas, and she said that, of course, Douglas had accused me of trying to keep Spane from seeing him.  What a jerk!  He refuses to even think that he might have hurt Spane so much when he threatened him with foster care.  Like everything else, he refuses to take any responsibility.

Well, let me tell you a little bit about Hewlett Packard.  They sell cheap printers that work just fine until you decide to upgrade your operating system.  Then, when you try to install your old printer, you are informed that you have to roll back your operating system to one that the printer will accept.  They do not make drivers for the new operating system.  You have no choice but to go out and get a new printer.  No other printer manufacturer does this - every other manufacturer has patches you can download to make the drivers acceptable.

Of course, Theresa had an older printer that was not compatible.  We went on-line and looked for other printers that were in her price range that did not have that practice, and found a really nice wireless all-in-one printer from Epson.  It's a great printer, I highly recommend the Epson Workforce printer.

They also have their Internet through AT&T, which means that they have a proprietary combination modem and router.  If you change anything on it, like its CSID, it will stop broadcasting.  It took a technician from AT&T and I almost an hour to figure that out.  Not a fun thing to do.

We didn't get home until almost 12:30 this morning.  I'm tired, my back hurts from sitting on the floor for two hours, and I'm not doing anything today.

Thank God for Spane.  He's such a good boy, he cleaned the bathroom with bleach and cleaned up the living room, too.  I love my son!

Friday, January 27, 2012

Las Vegas for Kids

Spane's school had a fund raising event at Chucky Cheeses.  Amber and her kids were going to go, but Noelle had to go to Social Skills in Burbank today, so we went with Amber and Noelle.  Spane brought his homework with him.

When we got there, Noelle asked Spane if he wanted to go to group with her, and he said yes.  The counselor said that would be fine, so he went.

While Spane and Noelle were in session, Amber worked on making her family a daily schedule.  She went through several sheets of paper, but she finally had it.  I use Lotus Organizer, and have had a schedule for quite a while, although we don't always stick to it.  Doing the schedule with Amber was really helpful to me.

Going with Noelle was really helpful for Spane, too.  He was beaming when he came out.  I'm going to look into this for him as well.

Then we went to Chucky Cheeses for the fund raiser, which had started at 3 pm, and was going on til 9 pm.  We got there around 7pm, and the place was packed.  There was only one girl at the counter, with 30 people in line, and an hour wait for pizza.  We decided to get drinks only, and feed the kids after.

When we got home about 9:30, Spane was tired and happy.  He happily went to bed, without even looking at the computer.  Yes!

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Hello Kitty!

Spane and I took the first bus after school to get to his 4 pm appointment with his therapist.  As luck would have it, we arrived about 15 minutes early, and I suggested we go to the Good Will store across the street to kill that little bit of time.

I found a couple of books to read, and as I was checking out, across the counter one of the clerks had put a laptop on the counter.  It was a Hello Kitty laptop with Hello Kitty all over it.  It looked horrible, but I went and looked at it anyway.

The clerk said the only thing wrong with it was that it would not hold a charge, but I could get a battery on Amazon very inexpensively.  Since I had not gotten Spane a great Christmas present, and we did not go to Nevada for the Caucuses as I had hoped for his birthday, I told him the computer was both his birthday and Christmas present.  He was thrilled.

When we got to the therapist, I was sitting there talking to her, and fiddling with the top, when I discovered that the Hello Kitty was only contact paper!  I just peeled it off, and now Spane has a spiffy looking Compaq notebook computer!

Of course, that means some parental choices are going to have to be made.  It's a WinXP Home edition, so it can't use Family Safety.  I had to find another way around that, and posted the solution to it at winxp-home-how-parents-can-set-up-time-restrictions. It's a wonderful thing, and a wonderful parenting tool.